And without wanting to conduct the blog in a truly confessional mode, I'd resolved to go ahead and post the ups and downs of the project along with its twists and turns.
Well, now I'm not so sure about that, about documenting the ups and downs, that is, especially the downs. Sunday I posted the following,under the heading "Reality intrudes":
Since its inception (now over five years ago), New York in Plain Sight / The Manhattan Street Corners has been a self-financed undertaking, i.e., for all practical purposes nobody has been paying for it except me.
Not that I am ungrateful to the people who have purchased prints along the way, but sales of prints have covered altogether no more than at most a few percent of the expense of the project.
My searches for funders or patrons have come to nought and the reality is that I can no longer afford to go on with it myself.
So, pending some marvelously unforeseen positive cash flow, this is the last blog post for the foreseeable future. I'll leave the posts up — do feel free to browse, of course.
I'm also suspending any and all plans to continue with cleaning up — to say nothing of extending — New York in Plain Sight itself.
By my count there are still just under 200 corners to photograph or rephotograph in order to complete the set. They'll just have to wait. And at some point I'd still love to work up an entirely new site for it with a wide range of search and display options. For the time being though, it has to be put on hold — and I rather imagine that will be a rather lengthy and indefinite hold.
So — well, that's it for now. Thanks for dropping in now and then, it's been fun.
What can I say? Tired, feeling sorry for myself, and, especially, fed up with rich clients who seem to think it's their privilege not to have to pay their bills in a timely fashion.
Then I began to have doubts — doubts about the post, that is. I mean, it's not news to anyone that projects like this one have their ups and downs, and, more to the point, that artists, photographers, authors, whatever, have their ups and downs, especially since, for that matter, everyone does, absolutely everyone, apparently without exception. Self-pity just isn't on, even if it's become fashionable in some circles, and even a money-maker. (But a friend used to say to me, "go ahead and feel sorry for yourself, after all, no one else is going to.")
So this morning I deleted that post.
And then immediately I had second thoughts about that too. I mean, if I'm going to document this process in the way I set out to, don't I really have to go ahead with such things? I mean, it would be one thing not to write such a post, or to write it and not post it, and there have indeed been several that have been written but not posted (not all of them whiny, either).
A quandary of sorts, which, as you can see, I've resolved, sort of, for the moment at least, via this meta-post.
And this morning I'm not feeling as defeated by, well, everything, as I was on Sunday, so maybe this meta-post will serve me as a stimulus to get back in harness and get on with blog proper, to stir the pot some more around all the questions about neighborhoods and their signs of change.
More soon, though maybe not right away.